Friday, November 30, 2007

This is the end, my friends. It's over. No, no- it's not you, it's me.


Finally. Done.


No no no more NablopoChristThisWasHardMo.


A few items of note about posting every day:


1) You will not have any time to read other blogs. Period.


2) You will spend 2-3 hours each day trying to think of something to write on that or the next day's post, only to end up taking a picture of your feet and calling it a day.


3) Your ass will grow at a rate that is best illustrated with the following equation:

Time sitting trying to think of something to write x time spent actually putting the post together + meals consumed while held prisoner by the computer + looking up and realizing that you've spent 3 hours at the fucking computer and you really need to go to work now so I guess you won't be getting anything resembling exercise again today x 3.14159265...

=

Approximately 1.37 inches per week.


4) You will consider petitioning the board of directors to have Nablopomo held in the month of July, when you really hardly work at all and have nothing better to do than build dioramas, garden in your underwear, make pickles, take up smoking and blog. You will also consider holding your own July Nablopomo regardless of the board's decision.


5) You will wake up at 6:45 this morning and spend 4.5 hours (!!!!!!) trying to finally catch up and read everyone else's blog, which is the reason you like doing this "blogging" thing in the first place, only to realize that you've only made it halfway through your blogroll. You will then punch yourself in the face, just for fun.



6) You will get up, open the window and scream loudly as you realize that once again you need to get to work and you haven't done a damn thing yet except sit in front of the fucking computer.


7) AAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


8) You will yell out the window again (this time to the crowd of neighbors gathered beneath the window) that there is no need to call the police. Nope, everything is fine here. No, I'm not being attacked by that wandering band of dwarves that has the whole neighborhood up in arms. Move along, folks. Nothing to see here.


9) You will acknowledge that you have no one to blame but yourself for this, and you will admit (silently) that it was actually kind of fun to post every day. Fun like pity sex is fun, but kinda fun nonetheless.



Now, someone needs to get me a tall, frosty mug of champagne- stat.

That'd be great- thanks.

31 comments:

Suze said...

Congratulations! Although it was hard for you - it was a pleasure for your fans :)

One tall cold one coming up.

Lollie said...

Sooo, when will we hear from you again? January 7th-ish?

CDP said...

A good time was had by me, too. Dioramas are actually the subject of my post today.

dguzman said...

You did it! You're like Rudy from that Notre Dame movie. You're my hero.

T said...

Congratulations, you're a true endurance athlete!

Inarticulate Fumblings said...

I experienced all of the things you did... only my ratio of fat-to-ass was substantially higher... and I didn't even post everyday (*hangs head in shame).

Kudos to you. I'm going to pour myself a frosty mug of champagne in your honor.

Whiskeymarie said...

Suze- Make sure it's French. No cheap shit for me today...
;)

Lol- Probably tomorrow. Now I have a sad codependent thing going on with my blog.

cdp- Yours sounds great- pictures are required when the camera is functional again.

Dguzman- "did you ever know that you're my heeeerrroooooo..."

Maurey- If by "endurance athlete" you mean undisciplined and somewhat lazy, then yes! Yes indeed!

Whiskeymarie said...

Inarticulate- (clink) That's the two of us celebrating with our tall, frosty mugs. Who cares if you didn't post every day? No shame, mister!

McGone said...

And without your comments, my site has been lacking lately.

Oh, wait, it was lacking anyway because it's my site. Your lack of commenting hasn't helped though.

Katrin said...

Congratulations! You have made my days in November way more enjoyable than they might have been otherwise. I will have to get used to not getting something from you every single day.

The Ex said...

Congrats for making it!

Anonymous said...

I enjoyed every day of your posting. Congratulations on keeping us entertained and making me laugh!

Patti

Mariposa said...

Cheers! It was a nice month...and I enjoyed visiting your site...and reading your entries...

I will still frequent your site...so you still have to post. ;)

pistols at dawn said...

I feel like the words "American hero" are thrown around too often, which cheapens them somewhat, but you, miss, are an American hero.

Three generations ago, I imagine our ancestors worked 20 hour days building railroads, dreaming of a day their children's children's children could publicly post pictures of their feet.

I'm sure they'd thank you if they could.

Courtney said...

HOORAY!!! You made it! More than I can say for myself!

Jess Wundrun said...

Take a few tums to hide your whiskey breath when the UPS man delivers the wine I'm sending.

Please don't lie around in your own flop sweat not posting for too long 'kay?

EmBee said...

Here's a BIG 'Atta Girl I'm sending your way! Despite all your time spent blogging I appreciate you stopping by my pitiful, only blog when the mood strikes site. You Rock WM!

L Sass said...

Congratulations! I'm all for NaBloPoMo moving to a less holiday-filled month. Or a short month... like February!

TwistedNoodle said...

Congratulations! You did it. We did it. And now it's over. And as much as a pain in my butt it was at times, I have to also admit that it was fun too. I think I may take a couple-few days off unless something spectacular happens to write about. Have a great weekend.

Lisa said...

Congrats on making it all the way through! Glad I found you.

Flenker said...

Way to go! I knew you could do it! More congratulatory words! Blah blah blah!

I'm having a shot oh whiskey tonight for you. and one for me. And one for everyone else in the world that has a blog. Christ, this was a long day. and the start of a long weekend. great. I need to stop commenting when I'm a little tipsy and pissy!

Nocturnal said...

One order of champagne on the way for WM.

Cheers

Jon said...

Nice work, WM! I'm going to get drunk tonight in your honor. And possibly tomorrow night too. Hell, maybe even the entire month of December. With role models like you, anything is possible.

Ghost Dansing said...

nothing's against anything..... 'till you're caught

Nature Girl said...

wow...your math problem really explains a lot about the size of my ass. I guess it's time to get on the treadmill again! sigh...
I for one have loved reading your posts every day and will miss it now that Nov is over. I'll keep popping in daily, just in case....
Stacie

thethinker said...

Yay! You got through it. I don't have the willpower to commit to doing anything daily. This includes showering, brushing my teeth, combing my hair, etc.

Just kidding. I really hope you don't believe that.

brandy said...

Congratulations on completing this. I could not have done it. You deserve a gold medal in blogging.

Freida Bee, MD said...

It's kinda like you just ran a marathon and I drove in the little pick up next to you and said, "Wow, I like those cheetah running shoes. Where did you get them?" spilled the water you needed and drove off only to come back later with a tall frothy latte that scalded you despite the cheetah oven mitts and made you come in second. Fortunately, you are number one in our books, WM. Wait, was NoProbLo a contest or what? Self-Inflicted blobligation?

Gretta said...

Holy crap. You had 29 comments on this post!

BJB said...

aw, man! I did that crap last year and I hated it. I posted every day and still managed not to win any prizes. Such bullshit.

I think I need to start blogging again.

LaLa said...

You've been a paragon of every-day-blogging and I hold you in awe. I've never been able to do it. I can't imagine doing it, especially at this time of year. You knock yourself out and ignore us all for a while. We'll be here when you get back.