Wednesday, December 19, 2007

My shrink told me I have commitment issues.

It's not you, it's me.

No, you didn't say or do anything to piss me off. This time.

I've just know.


So I think I'll have time to work on our "relationship issues" now.

Oh, and read your blogs.
I hate when we're apart. It tears me up inside.

You might be asking yourself, "Now that we're an item again, what can I look forward to seeing & reading on NWYTISB in the upcoming weeks, you sexy bitch?"

Well, you saucy little firecracker, how about:
  • Pictures!
  • Lengthy debates about various topics including but not limited to: pajamas, snack foods, politics, sex, silly putty (and various uses of), cocktails, education, butts, psychological disorders among tree rodent populations, feet (and by default, toes), what I want for christmas, why I'm drunk again, who I pissed off today, monkeys, pretty shoes, fiber and various angry tirades. (Just kidding. You know I don't discuss politics here.)
  • Pictures!
  • Product endorsements!
  • Captain America vs. Aquaman: Who would be better in the sack?!?
  • Pictures!
  • Why karma hates me so!
  • Tales from summer camp!
  • More dating stories!
  • Apologies to all sorts of folks!
  • Pictures!
  • Nudity!
  • Feet!
  • Monkeys!
  • Pictures of nude monkeys playing with their feet!
  • And so on!
Maybe tomorrow I'll wear something pretty for y'all.

Oh, how I've missed you.


Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

We've missed you on our blogs, you've come back not a moment too soon.

Ghost Dansing said...

Once I thought I saw you
in a crowded hazy bar,
Dancing on the light
from star to star.
Far across the moonbeam
I know that's who you are,
I saw your brown eyes
turning once to fire.


Sugar Kane said...

I'd totall pick Captain America. Well, only if he let me wear the red boots.

H said...

SO jealous. I thought my break from work was long!

L Sass said...

Two-point-five weeks!!! Lucky beyotch!

Whiskeymarie said...

Monkey- I know. I could feel the blogosphere collapsing around me. I had to step in and save us all.

ghost- I love your references. Thanks for the link.

sugar- Me too! He's pretty buff, and I like a take-charge sort of guy.

sass- Not to fuel the jealousy, but that's oh...three-point-five weeks.
Sorry to rub it in there.

h- Does it help to know that most of this break is unpaid? Because it is.

Suze said...

Oh welcome back my Fond de veau!!

Nature Girl said...

whooohooo! Full time WM for a couple of weeks! There really IS a Santa Clause! I can't wait to see what's in store..

Whiskeymarie said...

suze- Back at'cha, toots.

Stacie- Don't think I have forgotten my tag from you, missy. Tomorrow or friday- watch out!

Fran said...

Yes - like Dr. Monkey, who I think introduced us, I was growing concerned...

Where is Whiskey? The question burned in my brain like cheap hooch on an empty stomach.

January 14th... Wow. Happy for you but jealous as all hell.

Oh wait. I am out of work. I guess I am off too!

CDP said...

Welcome back and enjoy your break! I'm off til January 3 (after tomorrow, that is). Merry Christmas and all!

lizgwiz said...

Oh, Captain America, definitely!

What does it say about me that I'm most intrigued by psychological disorders of tree rodents?

Enjoy your time off!

Candy said...

Aquaman would be better in the sack. Because he can hold his breath longer.

Mommy Lisa said...

Captain America or Aquaman...hmmm. I bet Aquaman would be a sloppy kisser, but that could be good for other hmmm "activites", I think I will say Aquaman.

But, where does Batman figure in all of this? Clooney or Kilmer, I'd take 'em both.

Mariposa said...

Nice to hear from you and hoe I envious I am...I just can't be away from work that long...

McGone said...

And I'm off 'til the 2nd. I hardly know what to do with myself.

Can we please skip the "feet" topic? I'm sure that won't go well.

EmBee said...

Aquaman definitely, he doesn't have to come up for air with those gill thingy's... And he's used to the smell of fish.

Whoo! What got into me today?

Stacey said...

Uh the words "you suck" come to mind.

Sorry...I'm just very bitter that I'm only off for 1.5 days for Christmas. Woe is me.

Stefanie said...

January 14?? And I was excited just because I'm not at work again until the 2nd. Enjoy your much-deserved time off!

NotSoccer Mom said...

damn, and i thought i had it good! i'm off til jan 7!