Is it so wrong that I don't want to go to my neighborhood's "National Night Out" Block party?
I really don't. I just don't feel like it. I'm not one of those "people". You know- the kind of people who excel at everyday conversations and not being an ass.
We didn't go last year either.
I want to move in a few years anyways, so it's not like we'll be neighbors for much longer if I have my way.
Do I have to go? Is it my duty as the neighborhood shrew? Who will keep an eye on the local hooligans if I am otherwise occupied? Before we know it, they'll have ransacked our homes, orchestrated major drug deals and LITTERED. Someone has to keep on top of these things, you know. I don't see anyone else holding vigil in their front porch, cellphone in hand- 9, 1...just give me a reason to dial the other one, you hoodlums. I dare you.
Am I a bad neighbor if I don't go? Do my neighbors hate me? Or, are they just jealous of my surrealist art skillz as interpreted through gardening and my seemingly entire lack of modesty?
Crappedy, crap crap. What to do...
Make a cold salad, have a glass of wine and boldly head over, or- shut all the blinds, tape off the house with "caution" tape and pretend we're quarantined with Avian Flu?
Dammit. I hate decisions.