Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Wedgies: They're not just for underwear and potatoes anymore.

(Boys, this is a post about shoes. There's nothing for you to see here. Move along now.)
(What's that? You like the shape of my toes? And you want to sniff them? Well...o.k. Just don't scratch the leather, jackass. And quit fondling my arches. Ick.)

So, to reward myself with the bounty I so richly deserve for being, well, great- I deserve shoes. Shoes that remind me how ugly I am during the week when I wear these:

I need:

Pretty shoes.

Wedgie shoes. (Yes, I call them wedgies, not wedges. Whatever.)

Slingbacks- my favorite in all the history of shoes. As well as patent, my other most-favorite.

Oh, did I mention the extra $800 cha-ching I am bringing to the table via my overtime and humanitarian work this week? By humanitarian, I mean I have a friend who caters & needs my help this Sunday.
For many dollars an hour.

I'm still frugal, however, and I need YOUR help picking out my new pair of kicks, as I am cheap and cannot bring myself to buy more than one. Number them 1-4, top to bottom (ignore the clogs, dear god, please), and tell me which ones you think I should buy and why.

I know, they're not as avant-garde as I could be- and usually am.

Sorry, these days I like wearable AND cute.

Patent? Green? Floral for summer? Safe but versatile taupe?
Purrrrr....stroke my shoes baby, fondle my heels.

Whatever gets the most votes wins, and I buy.

Simple & democratic. A popular vote, the way it should be.

Shoes bless America!

I feel sexier already.
Now I just need to wash my hair...and shave my sasquatch legs...and make sure I have mascara on both eyes, and eat something that occurs naturally in nature, and get some sleep...Zzzzz....


Failcooks said...

Obviously the floral ones. They're the only pair I can truly envision riding on someone's shoulders. Why waste your hard-earned dollars on anything less? The floral deals. No contest.

TwinsGoddess said...

I vote for pair #3, the florals, as well.

They'll go with just about everything (unlike the green ones), won't show wear like the lighter-colored ones, and I find them just a smidge sassy-er and more fun than the patent leather.

I think because of the flowers.

Kate said...

I like the green. Green can go with a whole lot more than you think it can. I have a coat that color that I get mad compliments on. #2 would be the florals. #3, the patent. #4 the taupe.

T said...

With my running, my knees are already going to decay in record time. I know this. No need to hasten the knee replacement. No wedgies for me.

I'll live vicariously through you in the florals.

Domestically Disabled Girl said...

i say the green. definitely the green. my #2 is choice the taupe. #3 is the florals and #4 is the patent. here is why: green is my favorite color, hands down. i love green. and i agree with kate, green goes with more than you think.

happy shoe buying!

Brillig said...

I dig the florals too, but my vote is for the green. Really, you can't go wrong either way. I'm not a fan of the taupe ones, and I actually really like the patent ones, but they're a little more "safe" than "sassy".... in my oh-so-humble-and-probably-completely-bunk opinion.

ps said...

the black patent cork wedges. they are beautiful. then the green. smooch.

thethinker said...

1 Green
2 Floral
3 Taupe
4 Patent

metalia said...

I am LUSTING after the green ones...though I'm also a sucker for patent leather. (Helpful, aren't I?)

Whiskeymarie said...

All on Zappos.com, if you're interested, my little sweet things.