Tuesday, January 8, 2008

Hot-blooded, check it and see, I've got a fever of a hundred and three...

On Sunday I thought I was coming down with whatever version of the bubonic plague that everyone else seems to be getting. I was achy, tired and my head felt like I had somehow found a way to replace the gray matter with industrial-grade pork gravy. I even canceled on what (so I've heard) turned out to be a debaucherous evening with lady M and Stacy.

But Monday came around, and poof! all better. Seriously. I felt as normal as someone who takes spiritual advice from squirrels possibly can. In fact, I was bragging (the nerve!) to a co-worker yesterday that I never get sick. Seriously, I don't. The last time had to be at least 4 years ago.
I attribute my superhero constitution to the booze.

Now today, karma has once again proven beyond a reasonable doubt that it's sole purpose is to mess with my monkey-addled brain. That karma, she sure can't take a joke.

I'm sick. For real this time.

My throat feels like I was doing 18-hour shifts down by the docks for the last two weeks.
I was winded just getting out of bed. Normally that only happens when I've gone on some sort of pasta & potato-fueled carb binge for several days.

So I'm off to lay on the couch, watch bad tv, have soup, tea and toast and basically just wallow in the sicky sickness.

But first I suppose I should take my temperature, don't you think?

My technique is a bit rusty. Is this the correct method? Is it really safe to do this with a digital thermometer?

Oh well, here goes nothin'...

28 comments:

abbersnail said...

I'm so sorry, ladybug! And also? I need your address, stat! I used to have it, and I have naturally lost the tiny piece of paper that it was written on. Awesome.

Stacey said...

Um not that I really want to quibble being that you're sick and all but if you really were doing 18hour shifts on the docks wouldn't that special protein coating have soothed your throat a little...

Ok, dear, I hope you're better soon.

Smooches,
WM

lizgwiz said...

Well, that's the technique I use on my cats, so...

I'm never sick, either, though I've learned never to say that out loud, or karma will get me. (Saying it in blog comments doesn't count, right? Right?)

LaLa said...

Step away from the thermometer, Whiskeymarie!! Step away.

Hope you feel better soon. I'm sure a soul-leaching dose of daytime television will pep you right up.

Also, my theory is 'boil 'em alive' - I drink the absolute hottest liquids I can to scald the little bacteria to smithereens. Scald, with my blessings.

McGone said...

Could this illness be at all related to you wallowing in your own fetid sloth?

Flenker said...

I've been fighting a cold for oh, about 5 weeks. Other than that, I never get sick. When I am, though, I make it count.

CDP said...

Hope you feel better!

Lollie said...

If your technique is a bit rusty, here's to hoping that your thermometer ain't...

Chiada said...

Hehehe, only you could be sick and still be so funny. I hope you feel better soon!

Gretta said...

Your technique can be rusty, just make sure the thermometer is NOT.

Feel better!

Jon said...

Foreigner references? Gratuitous butt shots? There's a reason you're still on my blogroll.

Inarticulate Fumblings said...

This site will give you a play by play if you need help... pictures and all.

Suze said...

Man, you forgot the little plastic cover thing that goes on it.

Feel better. Watch Maury and those paternity tests. It'll bring your temperature down a degree.

Fran said...

Ouchy! Careful there girl!

Stacy said...

Oooooh sweet patootie! I'm sorry you got the funk (and not the good Stevie Wonder-style). I'll send a real email. Promise.

diatribes and dish said...

Are you really going to let that thermometer conquer the elusive brown-eye? I don't know about you, but my brown-eye's a one way street, and nothing and no one treads the wrong way. Thermometers included. Hope you feel better!

NotSoccer Mom said...

hope you feel better soon! i just got over strep throat... not fun.

gorillabuns said...

maybe you need more alcohol to pickle the illness out of you.

that is usually my cure for all that ails me.

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

Get well soonmy crazy friend.

Grant Miller said...

You can also apply HeadOn there.

Shannon Erin said...

Feel better, my fellow Foreigner fan.

Ghost Dansing said...

hot blooded

dguzman said...

yee-ouch! Lala above supports my cure--piping hot liquids--only for my liquids, I get super-fucking-hot water and add the juice of a whole lemon and about a teaspoon of salt. I call it "Hot Lemon Water." It's like patented or something.

Nature Girl said...

Yikes...I'm so sorry you're sick! I hope you get better soon...and if that's where you're trying to stick that thing, you really HAVENT been sick in awhile have you? These days they shove them in the ears...who knew!
stacie

Nature Girl said...

Yikes...I'm so sorry you're sick! I hope you get better soon...and if that's where you're trying to stick that thing, you really HAVENT been sick in awhile have you? These days they shove them in the ears...who knew!
stacie

Amaya said...

Even when you're sick you're funny as hell. LMFAO

Nocturnal said...

What's the difference between an oral and anal thermometer?

The taste.

Get well WM.

Cheers

Butrfly Garden said...

I'm so late, I get to say, "Hope you're feeling better now!"