Thursday, May 31, 2007

Random acts of random randomness

After being the recipient of a random act of kindness (one involving a cocktail, nonetheless), I had boldly stated that I, too, would carry the torch of niceness. Mine is really more of a stick with a kerosene-soaked burning rag at the end, but it is a NICE stick with a kerosene-wrapped rag at the end.

I don't do this for the fame or the money.

I don't do it because I want a plaque or a medal (well, maybe a small trophy of some sort- please, though, keep it modest. I'm humble like that), but I do it because I want to show that I am not the sort to make sweeping statements and promises that I never follow up on (well, not this one anyways. This one is different. Like how I lost interest in accordion lessons almost immediately upon starting them, but that was only because I didn't fully understand my musical calling: the piano. No, I mean drums. Shit! No, it was the saxophone...).

Randomly nice or sort of nice or let's-just-call-them-nice Whiskeymarie acts in the last 1+ weeks:

* Gave away a VERY lucrative catering, even though I would like the $$, to a mom I like who just had the engine blow on her minivan.

* Sent someone close to me some $$, even though we're not exactly spewing cash from our money fountain in the back yard right now.

* Didn't call animal control on my neighbor that lets her 2 hyper dogs Bark and bark and bark and bark and bark and bark and bark and bark and bark and bark and bark. (our fair city has a 5-minute dog barking ordinance.) Anyone who knows me knows that I normally DO NOT put up with this sort of shit. I'm giving her another month and another talking to before I act. Maybe not exactly qualifying me for sainthood, but nice for me.

* Didn't tell a coworker she was being a total bitch, even though she was.

* Cleaned up garbage as I walked in my neighborhood the other day. My neighbors probably thought I was working off my community service sentence. I should have worn an orange jumpsuit. With heels and a propeller beanie.

* Had a random dog wander into my yard without a tag and spent the next 30 minutes trying to find the owner. When I found them, and even though it turned out to be the most hated house in the neighborhood, I was still very nice and polite. Though, it was a good dog they don't deserve and I should have kept her. Nice? Maybe, maybe not.

That's all for now- I have to go and do my second catering of the day at some rich asshole's pool party. I got called last minute & agreed to it.

Can I count that one too? I say yes.

Be nice to each other. Do nice things.

Unless you don't want to- then just be an asshole.

It's o.k, I do it all the time.


Stacey said...

WhiskeyMarie - you are a saint. I bow down to you.

BTW, thanks for the offer to take care of Ariel for me. I think I just might have to take you up on that and if your "friends" do it you can still be considered a saint.

H said...

I was nice and let a big cement truck cut in front of me today even though he was being retarded and almost killed me a couple of times. And I did not flip him off even though I wanted to. I hope he passes on the niceness.

My random act of kindness in no way compares to yours.

Butrfly Garden said...

Pay it forward, WhiskeyMarie...think of all the good that will come from this now that you made all these people...not mad. :)

The picking up of the garbage even made me happy. And it really had nothing to do with me! See how it spreads itself out!?

Sugar Kane said...

You are truly an inspiration. I think Chicago was singing about you. Maybe tomorrow I'll do something nice. But probably not.

lucy said...

I didn't kill the cat that attacked my brother today...does that qualify?

Definitely count the last minute commitment. Those can be a pain to do deal with... but add to the money fountain, no?

I totally respect your random niceness. Better than I could do.

viciousrumours said...

Never underestimate what your "little" act might mean to someone else. Sometimes a kind look is enough to make someone not feel like the world is coming to an end. We can't ALL be Mother Theresa...

Domestically Disabled Girl said...

you are inspiring, but i am crabby today. it's an asshole kind of day for me. maybe i'll be nice tomorrow.

but hey, keep up the good work!

Lollie said...

I love that your Pay It Forward is sometimes Paying By Keeping It In Your Pocket. Meaning, to not do the thing that you would normally do is the nice thing. That's so me! You've inspired - I'm going to go do something nice this weekend...or probably just not do something bitchy.

nancypearlwannabe said...

Wow, that's a lot of nice things for one week. I think I'd have to spread out my niceness over a period of months... parse it out. Make it last, because you never know when it might run out.

Margie Blystone said...

Ooops! My 'Paying it forward to the assholes can be fun too' comment accidently inserted itself part-way through the story... Sorry 'bout that!

Christa said...

my good deed yesterday was to go to the movie "waitress" alone, so i didn't have to subject anyone else to the crap that was that movie.

Whiskeymarie said...

Margie honey, If I could, I would give you a "you're my hero" slap on the ass right now.
You, my dear, are a force to be reckoned with.

C- I'm glad for the heads-up, we were maybe going to go to it tomorrow. I think we'll go to "Knocked up" instead.
We're very cultured and refined like that.

Kate said...

Holy crap, Margie Blystone, I have never laugherd so much from reading a blog comment. Bravo!

Lollie said...

Oh Margie - you are my new hero.