Tuesday, June 3, 2008

We interrupt our regularly scheduled programming...

I know I boycotted memes, but I've got nothing else today, and I can't say no to the lovely Freida Bee. I also can't figure out why Blogger insists on only letting me write in italics right now, but that's neither here nor there.

Because I'm unable to put together anything substantive today...

Ten years ago, what were you doing?

Ten years ago, I was in the final stretch of Culinary School and counting every second until I would be done. I’m glad I went, but I hated most of my fellow students by this point and needed to be the fuck away from them. Nighttime, I was working nearly full-time at my first cooking job- a medium-fancy seasonal place that was located on an old tugboat on the Mississippi river. The boat had been converted into a B&B/restaurant, but it was docked- it didn’t actually go anywhere. The boat was heavy, but it still moved slightly with the waves. After 8+ hours on board, I was usually a little “wobbly” back on land. I still consider this my favorite food job I’ve had (not counting owning my own place) and wish it still existed so I could work there part-time again. The kitchen itself was tiny- think butts to nuts- but it was horribly efficient and we all had a ton of fun. Two of us on the line could put out 200+ covers on a really busy night (we did all of the salads, appetizers and entrees- in other words, a LOT), but as fast and furious as it got, by the end of the night and after a glass or two of wine we were all friends again. I taught myself to really multi-task here, and finally learned, hands-on, what it all meant - this profession of mine. I don’t know that I would be where I am now had I not worked there first.

Five Things on Today's "To Do" List...

1.Get a few belated things in the mail & run a few mundane errands.

2. Maybe work out, maybe not.

3. Maybe shower.

4. Try to not: get in trouble, put my foot in my mouth, make promises I can’t keep, speak without thinking, lose my keys, have something stuck in my teeth, lose my pants, stare blankly at anyone, say “fuck” too much, eat too much cheese, pull anyone’s finger or punch strangers.

5. Learn Mandarin Chinese.

If I were a Billionaire, I would...

1.Buy an Island, turn into a unkempt recluse.

2. Hire a personal assassin on retainer.

3. Take yodeling lessons.

4. Hire someone to chew my food for me.

5. Start my own religion based on achieving a higher consciousness through dutiful worship of powerful aliens from the planet Partytron.

Three Bad Habits I Have...

1. Some people say I’m too successful and charming.

2. Spinning my wheels- never having time, yet getting nothing of any consequence done.

3. Procrastinating on things that need immediate attention, diving head first into things that could use a bit more thought and planning.

3.5. You. You’re a hard habit to break.

Five Places I've Lived

1. Minnesota (Duluth)

2. Minnesota (NE Minneapolis)

3. Minnesota (N Minneapolis)

4. Minnesota (Lowertown St. Paul)

5. Minnesota (Current home in St. Paul)

Five Jobs I've Had (I’ve listed a few before in another meme, I’m trying to not repeat here)

1. Plant nursery worker. (Just like Freida! This is the only reason I know anything about gardening)

2. Cook/Chef/Pastry Chef/Dishwasher/Server/Hostess/overall Kitchen whore

3. Call Girl (Just kidding- that’s my alter ego, “Champagne Misti”- not me)

4. Jewelry inspector at a wholesale jeweler.

5. Counter Girl at a Chinese restaurant (I pretty much sat and took orders for take-out. That's it.)

(This next one is my addition)

Three things I wish I could do today, but can’t:

1) Not work.

2) Win the lottery.

3) Advanced Trigonometry. I never was any good at math.


McGone said...

I assume you were fired from the Chinese restaurant on account of you being able to understand and communicate with the customers.

Iheartfashion said...

Nice list!
I once "cooked" on a boat too, but it mostly consisting of microwaving slightly rancid hot dogs for very drunk charter fishermen who were going to throw them up as soon as we got out to sea anyway.

punchlinewalking said...

Its always a good day for me when showering is in the "maybe" category! I may steal the idea for this post to extend my ban on substantive posting.

John said...

RE: "...1. Some people say I’m too successful and charming.

Well this is true, but you're so sexy that it's impossible to hate you.

RE: "...3.5. You. You’re a hard habit to break.

I've been waiting so long to hear those words from your lips.

RE: "...1. Minnesota 2. Minnesota 3. Minnesota 4. Minnesota 5. Minnesota.

Do Minnesotans actually say stuff like, "YAHH!" (meaning "yes," like in my favorite movie "Fargo?") Do Minnesotans LOVE or HATE Prince? And is Mall of America all that? - I used to want to visit Minnesota to go to Mall of America but now I want to go to meet Whiskey Marie. Because I love her so.

Whiskeymarie said...

John- quick answers:
*Yes, some people here sound EXACTLY like they stepped out of "Fargo", just not all of us. You Betcha.
*Mostly, we love him, no matter how batshit crazy he gets.
*Yes indeed, the MOA is all that and a bag of chips.

3carnations said...

Counter girl at a Chinese restaurant? Awesome. Only once, ever, have I seen a non-Chinese person working in a Chinese restaurant. He was a redhead and stood out like a sore thumb.

180|360 said...

I hate trigonometry. My first job was in a restaurant where I did a little bit of everything at one time or another. I learned more there than any other job in my whole life.

Gwen said...

We have identical bad habits. Thanks for the birthday love. MWAH!

Shoot! I almost forgot! Loved the card but peed a little when I saw that a giftie is coming. So.excited. I hope you accomplished the first half of #1 on the to-do list. DOUBLE MWAH!

Distributorcap said...

have you ever lived in minnesota?

L Sass said...

For when you make your billions:

I am available for hire as an assassin.

Freida Bee, MD said...

Oh snap, crackle and plop plop, fizz fizz, oh what a relief it is.

(I don't know why, I just wanted to say that, and then I wrote it.)

When were 99.5 year old widows, will you have a lesbian affair with me (and DCup, of course)?

gorillabuns said...

I ponder the showering question daily.

dguzman said...

I can help with the assassinations and the trig. For everything else--you're on your own.

pistols at dawn said...

I cooked on a boat, but it was crack cooking, so I don't know if that counts.

Moe Wanchuk said...

I'm doing the exact same thing I did 10 years ago....Begging!!!!!!!

"Honey, can you PLEASE BEND OVER....I Promise I won't put it........'there!'

Lara said...

I really love that you would take yodeling lessons if you were a billionaire.