Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Putting the "win!" back in wino.

Quick quiz:

Which of the following answers best completes this statement?

Last night I, Whiskeymarie, _______________________________________.


a) Stayed home, watched "Dancing with the Stars", made a big bowl of popcorn and worked on a "sad clown" needlepoint project.

b) Completed my paper for HLTH102 titled "Syphylis and Herpes: that little itch could be telling you something".

c) Converted to Judaism and threw myself a belated bat mitzvah.

d) Went out with Stacy and M, drank my weight in wine, had a very pungent vial of perfume break in my purse, and somehow managed to get us all kicked out of one of the skankiest strip clubs in Minneapolis.


Please use a #2 pencil and fill in the answer circle completely.

Your score will be mailed to you in 6-8 weeks. Good luck.

23 comments:

Flenker said...

I'm going with D. Obviously.

diatribes and dish said...

I was going to go with A, but now I'm thinking D. I think I can feel your headache from here.

gorillabuns said...

I say D only because I think you were

a) chastizing the clients that they don't tip enough.
b) comparing bodies of the dancers.
c) doing body tequila shots on the stage.
d) all of the above.

Lollie said...

C'mon people! It's obviously C!

Mommy Lisa said...

Had to be the Double-Deuce as the club. Why do I know this? I have been there, it is skanky, but after you drink to much wine in NE--say at Jax---it sounds like it might be fun!

McGone said...

Please use a #2 pencil and fill in the answer circle completely.

You totally tricked me! I marked up at least 3 different computer screens before I realized that there were no circles!

Sornie said...

Dancing with the stars because, honestly, who wouldn't watch such a great show. SUre, that's it.

EmBee said...

I want to say D but I'm gonna have to go with A... But I REALLY want to say D.

EmBee said...

P.S. Clowns, be they happy, sad or otherwise, completely FREAK me the hell out! Thanks for that image, I'll be seeing it in my nightmares!

Melissavina said...

Hmmm... B? No one's guessed that one yet and I like to encourage the underdog.

And that sad clown as needlepoint is almost so terrible that it's awesome. ALMOST.

Stacey said...

C. fo sho ;)

Ghost Dansing said...

 c..... i think its c

Idan Raichel was born to an Ashkenazi family in Kfar Saba, Israel. Raichel began to play the accordion at the age of nine. He was attracted to gypsy music and tango, and studied jazz piano in high school, which improved his improvisational skills and ability to collaborate with other musicians.

Gretta said...

I so very badly want it to be "A". I can't be the only one, can I?

Failcooks said...

I believe the bouncer's reasoning was "these girls pay a house fee to take off their clothes here. We can't have you doing it for free." Yeah, it was something almost exactly like that. If it makes you feel any better, I was awakened by my sainted husband, passed out on the floor, wearing an ill-fitting wedding dress and a pair of cowboy boots.

Fran said...

I can't wait to hear about this one!!!

(Judaism? Who would have thunk it?)

3carnations said...

Originally A, but changing to D...

My word verification: MWFELIM

Married white female eliminated?
Does that mean I'm wrong?

Nature Girl said...

I really want to say D, but it might be too obvious..you know how if you watch any crime drama on tv they always give you a lead suspect and make it seem so obvious he did it..he had the motive, he had no alibi, he had the time and the grudge adn the temper and the next thing you know it was the meek housewife that never raised her voice above a whisper and weights in at a whopping 85 pounds soaking wet...well yeah...that's why D is too obvious...I'm going to have to go with A though I don't picture you a needlepoint person, that's EXACTLY *WHY* it has to be A.

That's my final answer. Though D sounds MUCH more fun....

Stacie

lizgwiz said...

The real question--are there pictures? ;)

Jon said...

Math is hard. Nice work on the drinking though!

kirby said...

This is a trick question. I say you went to a strip club, picked up a Jewish stripper with herpes, and had matching sad clown tattoos inked onto your butt.

L Sass said...

Is it wrong that I hoped it was A so that I wouldn't be the only one who found myself watching that Dancing With the Stars crap?

CDP said...

We look forward to the follow-up post with pictures (of the bat mitzvah of course. Mazel Tov, Whiskala)

The Grand ChaHee said...

I'm looking for the e) all of the above option...However, that would mean you were a VERY busy girl.

Option D is my guess... Option a, is just a little too sad; you've never mentioned a looming health class before (that i can remember) so B is out... and c, well, a wednesday night isn't really proper for a bat mitzvah.

but I'm still a gentile--