I said no more memes for a while, dammit. But I was sucked in by the charm and flattery that is the Evil Genius. How can I say no to a declaration of love? Plus, you know how I love me some evil.
One more, than my moratorium on memes is back, dammit.
8 Things I’m Passionate About
1. Any and all pork products.
2. Being right, occasionally.
4. Jake Ryan
5. Bargain shopping- I dig through racks like I’m collecting evidence at a crime scene. Every freaking inch gets searched, cataloged and tagged as evidence.
6. Perfect carrot cake and my homemade mac & chz.
7. Making time to do nothing but lay around the front porch and read magazines.
8. Singing badly, often.
8 Things I Want to Do Before I Die
1. Win the lottery.
2. Become infamous.
3. Open another restaurant.
4. Find a cure for “old”.
5. Finish my quest for the perfect Rueben.
6. Master the art of saying “no”.
7. Kick Dick Cheney in the balls.
8. Clive Owen.
8 Things I Often Say
4. “are you going to finish that?”
5. “yes, I’ll have another glass”
6. “where are my damn pants?”
7. “Fuckety, fuck, fuck”
8. “No, I don’t mind. Not at all.”
8 Books I’ve Read Recently
(And by recently I mean in the last year. This has not been the most “literary” period of my life)
- The Heroin Dairies, by Nikki Sixx of Motley Crue
- We tell ourselves stories in order to live, by Joan Dideon. (I’ve been plodding through this for freaking ever now)
- Candy Girl by Diablo Cody
- The good life, by Jay McInerney
- Music for torching, by A.M. Homes
- Slack Jaw, a memoir, by Jim Knipfel
- House of the Sleeping Beauties, by Yasunari Kawabata
- 1965 Esquire Party Book
8 Songs I Could Listen to Over and Over
1. Duran Duran “Rio”
2. Elliott Smith “Pitseleh”
3. ELO “Turn to Stone”
4. Gnarls Barkley "Smiley Faces"
5. The The "Love is stronger than Death"
6. Joy Division "She’s Lost Control"
7. Big Black "Bad Houses"
8. The Smiths "I Know it’s Over"
8 Things That Attract Me to My Best Friends
1. We all stopped giving a shit a long time ago.
2. Our love of VH1.
3. They drive much better than I do.
4. Our mutual adoration of Top the Tater and Doritos.
5. Extravagant birthday gifts.
6. Nice tits.
7. They hold their liquor much better than I do, and that is worth noting.
8. Forgave me for peeing in the plant that one time (see #7).
8 Things That Drive Me Crazy
1. Tall, dark and handsome.
2. People that can’t just get to the fucking point in a reasonable amount of time.
3. Badly cooked eggs.
5. Bold, blatant selfishness.
6. Fat dudes with no shirts on the first few warm days of spring/summer.
7. The smell of bacon cooking.
8. When I lose my pants.
8 People I Think Should Go All "Crazy 8's" on Us
Tagging innocents for memes makes baby Jeebus cry. Do this if you want, don’t if you don’t. I’m not the boss of you.
We have well established by now that this is where memes go to die.
And, so...no more memes for a looooong time, pretty please. Please? Even if I give you a virtual french kiss?
Happy Friday, my eight-legged, hairy creepy-crawly thingys.