Wednesday, December 10, 2008

I dare you to lick that metal pole.



Don't get me wrong- I love that winter's here...

but waking up today to -6 degrees, gray skies and a 13-hour work day is just wrong wrong wrong.

It's so cold outside that when I stepped out the door this morning I'm pretty sure my vagina froze shut.

I'm getting a nice, warm blanket, some slippers and my mittens, then I'm crawling under my desk for a nap. Wake me up when it's time for lunch.

24 comments:

LittlePea said...

Didn't want to piss you off or anything but....I'm wearing shorts today and using my air conditioner....!

Dr Zibbs said...

That picture looks like the teeth of an ice monster. Admit it.

surviving myself said...

I hope your husband doesn't mind the vagina problem.

gorillabuns said...

While it may be 29 degrees here, the weather has nothing to do with why my vagina has frozen shut.

Charmaine said...

It's freezing here too. I think it's gonna be 72 degrees.

After living in southern california for 20 years this sends me running for my long underwear.

Help...I can't feel my toes.

pistols at dawn said...

Every so often, I run into people from the Twin Cities, and they try to sell me on their state/cities. But 10,000 lakes just means tons of mosquitoes in the summers and the colder-than-anyplace-not-part-of-the-former-Soviet-Union winters, so I'm not buying.

Stacey said...

"They" are calling for snow here in the Pacific NW for the weekend

That makes me want to kill "they".

Last night, my son asked me if it would be spring the next day. When I said no it wouldn't be spring for quite some time, he protested. If I'd ever questioned him being my kid (because ,yes, sometimes you do question if someone is yours even when they are pulled form your loins). I wish for spring every other day.

McGone said...

I can't add a witty comment to a post that contains the phrase "I'm pretty sure my vagina froze shut." My mind can't process the horror and just shuts down.

H said...

Weather. So. Sucky. Hate. Hate. Hate.

Hope your vagina thaws out.

Gwen said...

I recommend an electric blanket for your special brand of va-jay-jay problem. Just be sure to get up before it melts and electrocutes your ass. Literally.

Talk With No Thought said...

I hate it when my vagina freezes shut. Takes FOREVER to thaw out.

Anonymous said...

Minus 6 degrees? Holy shit.

That is why I love looking at winter pictures while I sit here in shorts and a t-shirt.

Hope you thaw out soon......

Patti

Giggle Pixie said...

Know what goes good with a frozen vagina? A pitcher of frozen margaritas. No worries about indiscriminate sexual encounters, so you can really just sit back and enjoy the fun.

LOL

Suze said...

Since it's 70 degrees here, I have no idea how people deal with weather that goes that low. I'll be thinking of you at the beach while you're under your desk.

Melissavina said...

I don't understand why you live there? Negative six degrees? It's one thing to enjoy the spectrum of the seasons, but that's more like Mother Nature's wrath to me. Its a balmy (what does balmy mean) 70 degrees here today. Lovely.

Anonymous said...

Yes, the tundra-type days suck here in Minnesota, but nothing beats sitting at home watching the snow fall by a warm fire, with a good man, and a hot adult beverage!! Those are the kind of winter days to live here for!!!!
~ Renata1967

Fran said...

Oh I have licked that pole alright. I can't even begin to tell you what happened next...

Renaissance Woman said...

Cold here yesterday, but today in the high 50's...better. Good luck with the thawing process!

180|360 said...

Your vagina froze shut?!?!?! HAHAHAHAHA. I need more coffee so I can laugh even harder. My vagina is likely to disintegrate in a few weeks time up in Alaska. Merry Christmas, crotchless.

dguzman said...

Yikes.

patsy said...

oh no! poor mr. - it is gonna be a long time until the spring thaw out

Scope said...

What I think is funny, is that when I was talking to a guy from up around Moorhead (snicker) he could at least laugh at folks from Winnipeg and say, "What are THEY thinking!"


Hell, "Why not Minot? Freezin' is the reason!"

Anonymous said...

Frozen vagina? Isn't consuming large amounts of flavored alcohol a help?

Landis said...

freezer box!

sorry too easy