Monday, September 10, 2007

Insert "Chariots of Fire" theme here.

Today is one of those days.

One of those days where you feel like a starting gun went off instead of an alarm, and you feel like you should be wearing 80's terrycloth running shorts and a sweatband.

I really could use a crowd on the sidewalk, cheering me on and handing me glasses of ice cold chardonnay as I hobble on by, 18.5 miles into my 26-ish mile day.

This is the point in the race where I would be soaked in sweat, my mascara running down my face, my lipstick smeared and my bikini top ripped (oh, wait. wrong event. That's "foxy boxing", not running. Oops.)

Well, I'm pretty sure this is the point in my race where I would start bargaining with the gods of hurryupedness. "Give me more time! Give me the energy to not pee myself today. I haven't any time to go and I need a bladder of iron! Please, dear benevolent ones, grant me the power to get all the stuff done I should have done this weekend! Please!!! Let me not humiliate myself by finishing this race in the dark, long after they've pulled away the finish line and left me on the road with no one for company except the 89-year-old with not one, but two rebuilt hips. Please just let me get through this in a timely and calm manner and I promise I will leave clif bars and gatorade at your ceremonial altar. Please do this for me and I promise to try and think about being a more organized person. I promise! I'll really consider it this time!"

You know when you wake up and the first thing out of your mouth- while you're still in bed- is a whispered "Oh shit!" that, well...

gotta go- stuff to do, excuses to make, fires to put out, bullshit to deal with.

XO

p.s.- if you can't remember the theme- here it is. You'll be humming it all day...

16 comments:

Stacey said...

Lawd, No! Not the theme to Chariot of fire.

On another note I'm fiercely wishin' that you get the extra time you need and get things accomplished.

Just think of the nice glass of bubbly you can have when you do get things done!

Lollie said...

September ain't near over yet, however, I already know that the best line of the month is going to remain: You know when you wake up and the first thing out of your mouth- while you're still in bed- is a whispered "Oh shit!"

Nature Girl said...

I had exactly that kind of weekend. I hope your day goes better. I'll be one of the ones along the way handing out the glass of chardonay and cheering you on.
Stacie

kimmyk said...

i hate that kind of day.
i refuse to listen to the song because i got booty rump shaker music playing in my head...i dont wanna lose my groove thing.

-R- said...

Good luck! I am having that kind of day as well. So why am I taking the time to write this comment then, you ask? Because I apparently want to stay up until midnight finishing work. Ugh.

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

Mmmmm, foxy boxing.

LaLa said...

This post reminds me of that movie "Run Lola Run", only with a bikini and more chardonnay.

McGone said...

I pictured all the imagery from this post happening in slow motion, but instead of the theme from Chariots of Fire I ended up humming the Baywatch theme. Is that OK, or does it take away from the drama you were trying to establish?

Lollie said...

Great, now I've gone from Chariots to Baywatch, all the way back around to The Bionic Man sound effects.

Stacy said...

I've had a few of those lately too. Although, I second lala: the theme from Lola goes through my head as I start a particularly hectic day. "die tascha! die tascha!"

Can you come out and play tomorrow? Or do you have class?

Whiskeymarie said...

I have class until 9. I would love to hang for a while if it was St. Paul-ish.
Any chance of that happening?
e-mail me.
XO

Winter said...

Welcome to my life.

Kulpreet said...

Hey,
lOve the song!
Great!

Katrin said...

I was a bit confused after reading "Insert CARROTS OF FIRE theme here."

Have to get my eyes checked.

lizgwiz said...

I realize it's been a while since I had one of those sorts of days, and you know what? I'm fine with that. I'm sure my boss would not approve of my attitude. ;)

Butrfly Garden said...

Most of my days start with "Oh, Shit!" But that's because my hand has somehow learned how to shut the alarm off without my brain even realizing it. Damn hand.