I'm swamped today and I'll catch you up tomorrow (or not, I could be lying again), but I feel I should leave you with something, so I'll leave you with the most interesting thing that happened to me yesterday:
I was walking through Mississippi Market co-op on my way to work to pick up some lunch. As I was passing a woman fairly closely as someone with a cart was coming from the other direction, the woman farted. LOUDLY. It sounded like a whoopie cushion fart. It sounded like the kind of fart that makes one's buttcheeks undulate for several seconds after the fact. She made no apologies and moved on.
Problem was, we were in such close proximity to one another that I, in a moment of panic, quickly looked around to see who heard, thinking I could mouth "It was her" while pointing. Unfortunately, I just ended up looking like the guilty one as she was nonchalantly looking for Organic cat food nearby.
I shop there a LOT. I can only hope that I will now be identified as "that broad with the farts", or something like that.
There you go- see you tomorrow, my little fart-filled dumplings. Happy Thursday.