28 sauvignon blancs later

You know that feeling...

When you're so hungover that your ovaries hurt?

Yeah, it's kinda like that.

From days of yore.

I have no good stories today, and I'm frantically trying to get some shit done as we are going to Duluth this weekend for various family and kid b-days. All I've accomplished so far is:

• sleeping in
• few loads of laundry
• um...does looking at the flowers in my garden count?
• how about eating oatmeal?

For lack of imagination today, I thought I'd pull a few random-ish photos from the Whiskeymarie vault and post them with my recollections of the story behind them, or stuff I'll make up to make them more interesting.
My post, my rules, kiddos.



This was from maybe 1976-77(?) when me, my sister and a bunch of the neighbor kids decided to have a parade down our road. We donned our Halloween costumes (that would be me- batgirl, on the right. My sis is Wonder woman- bitch got all the good costumes) and we got one of the neighbors to lead the way with his tractor.

Problem is, almost no one knew of our grand parade, and I think the only people that came out to watch were our Moms.

We really should have had a committee plan this thing out beforehand.



















This is best explained here.

Note my Mom: smoke and a cup of coffee.

Note: the 1978 kitchen decor. Nice oil lamp.














I call this one:
"Pat Benetar and her white trash family with macrame" circa 1984

Like my pants? Awesome belt.

My dad looks like he works 3rd shift at the hot dog factory.

I'm just wondering why there is no plant in the planter.

Oh, and that's my gal D. She's tall, she played volleyball. That's my one poem for the day.









This was before me & the Mr. were married (so, like 23 years ago) when we decided to take a road trip to Graceland.
I was obsessed with going to the bowling museum in St. Louis on the way, and here I am.
They had a car shaped like a bowling pin and quilts made of bowling shirts. I wanted to move in, but instead bought a t-shirt.

This was the same road trip where we ended up driving 30+ hours without sleep. Long story for another time.
*I just noticed how freighting my pallor appears here. Thank you Mr. scanner. I'm actually not a zombie, lest anyone be confused. Though, I did try brains once. They tasted brainy.









This next one here is of a donkey that came up to our car window when we were lost in the Black Hills on a different road trip years later to Mt. Rushmore.



You will note that the donkey is being attacked by a light-saber wielding Jedi.
My Mr. had received this geektacular camera as a gift- it superimposed various Star Wars characters onto your cherished memories, creating a futuristic and not at all nerdy effect.

Half of our pictures from this trip look like this, with varying masters of the force on them. The Corn Palace really looks space-age with Princess Amadala hanging out there.

Yup. I married him.









So there you go for today.
Yes, you should be disappointed with the lameiocity of this post.
Too bad. I've got 3 hours worth of shit to do, and about 45 minutes to do it.

Maybe I'll see one of my Duluth blogger girls this weekend...
I'll be in Canal Park tonight, and out somewhere tomorrow, just don't know where.

Have a good weekend, my little chocolate-coated graham crackers.
XO
WM

"Whoo, whoo..." Pull over. Nerd Police, Ma'am. looks like we're going to have to give you a citation this time...

Reason #1) Today I spent 10 minutes standing perfectly still in my back porch while I waited for the robin that we just recently discovered has built a luxury condo in our cherry tree to eat some sunflower seeds that I dumped on the back sidewalk.

Perfectly still.

When she didn't bite, I figured her supersonic bird beak could smell me, so I quietly went in the house and continued to watch for another 10 minutes. Well, maybe it was 20. Who (with a life, hobbies and pride) can say?

Then I realized (after my 20 minute statue impersonation) that I was angry at the robin. Couldn't she see that I put the seeds there for her and her family???
Couldn't she see that I loved them???
Ungrateful bitch.

No, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it, my sweet red-breasted (tee hee) friend. Please don't go.
I love you, little birdy.



Reason #2) I watched the English-speaking Russian news channel for 2+ hours today, even though I had no fucking Idea what they were talking about (IN ENGLISH) 95% of the time.
Though confused, I still felt so very continental watching it. And smrt.
Oops, I mean s.m.a.r.t.
I'm drinking vodka right now to celebrate my newfound Eurotrashyness.





Reason #3) When I took off my socks today after 6 hours in a hot kitchen, I smelled them.
For no good reason.
They smelled like your grandpa's perpetually single brother "Hank" that always makes too much noise snorting and breathing eating Thanksgiving dinner after 4 brandys.
Yup, kinda like that.
Well, that intensified in a way that only 5 year-old rubber Birkenstock clogs can enhance foot odor.
Like a dog sniffing another dogs butt, I am.


Reason #4) I own rubber Birkenstock clogs. I want to slap me for that one.


Reason #5) I tripped today and instead of looking around embarrassed, I laughed and said to myself, "watch where you're going you stupid clumsy bitch."
Then I sang the reeses peanut butter cup ditty to myself.


Reason #6) I said "Word." As in "To your mother."


We are at nerd terror level chartreuse today, folks.
I'd take an umbrella and a change of underwear with me to work, if I were you...