Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Confession #3: I had to look up "harbinger" in the dictionary to make sure I was using it correctly.
I, Whiskeymarie VonPartypants, harbinger of all things cool and awesome...I used to freaking love Clive Barker (and still kind of do).
Yes, I said it. I willingly devoured the gory, strange writings that typically appealed more to nerdtacular boys with unhealthy addictions to Doungeons and Dragons and creative masturbation practices than to punk rock-ish girls in rural Minnesota in the 80's. I've read most of his books, I've (for better or for worse, usually worse) seen most of the movies (yeah, I'll take a pass on Hellraisers #2-9, thank you very much), and I even spent a number of hours in the early 90's waiting in line at Rosedale Mall for the honor of having Mr. Barker sign my copy of Weaveworld. I remember that he was very nice, kind of short, and not at all seeming like the kind of guy who could come up with some of the fucked up gore that he has come up with. He seemed more like the kind of guy that would write sensitive poetry about butterflies and tea than the kind of guy who regularly writes about evisceration and limbs being lopped off casually, like how one would cut apart a chicken for dinner.
I started watching Midnight Meat Train just the other night, a movie that I had been pestering the Mr. to get for me from Netflix, much to his chagrin. I'm only halfway through, but from what I've seen so far, I'm going to go out on a limb and say that it's not terrible. Considering the monumental stinkiocity of pretty much all of his other movies (Hellraiser #1 being the only exception- perfectly cheesy, sort of campy, and still appropriately scary), that's saying a lot. Bradley Cooper sure is easy on the eyes, and Vinnie Whatshisname was perfectly cast: almost no dialogue and creepy as hell. I think I'll finish watching it today- yes, I'll be the one sitting inside on a sunny, hot July day watching a movie about butchering humans for meat.
Oh, and while we're on topic of embarrassing confessions: Yesterday I decided put on eye cream while I was going pee, and I thought to myself, "Hey! I'm multi-tasking!".
Set the bar low, Whiskey. Set the bar low.